I am also …From the FUTUUUURRRRRE!!!
That’s right, it is I, Rickey Rat… FROM THE FUTURE.
(Hey everyone how’s it goin’ etc)
BACK… TO THE, err, TOPIC:
THE FUTURE.
Unfortunately, it is a very grim one.
We were all standing around, patting each other on the backs (IN THE FUTURE). In like 2020, scientist come up with a means of creating tiny wormholes that can be placed in toilets to send waste product to another dimension.
Over the next two centuries, the Earth is transformed into a Utopian paradise as we eradicate all waste product from our very realm of existence.
Then, one day in 2219, Helmutt Turttbridge, the CEO of “Portal Potty, INC” went missing. Rumor was that he had been sucked through the portal in his personal bidet.
He was found months later in the abandoned sewer tunnels beneath Paris, covered in crap and babbling incessantly about horrible times approaching and warning about “THE SHIT HITTING THE FAN”.
He made an attempt to shut down production of the corporation, but it was determined that he was no longer of sound mind and body, and production was doubled.
Some people listened to him though, and a small cult was formed, dedicated to “natural” waste disposal (now considered an act of terrorism) and the spreading of the 2/2/2222 message: That the place we’ve been sending our poop has figured out where it where it’s been coming from, and THEY ARE PISSED.
…And have figured out a way to build cyborg bio monsters (Turdminators) out of the genetic material in our waste, and send them BACK through the portals to kill us.
The human population is dwindling, the cities are controlled by heavily armed marauders.
Yes it actually happens. (UNLESS I CAN STOP IT – IN TIME) I have been sent back in time to warn everybody not to abuse quantum physics and wormhole technology, that we can’t just send our problems to another universe instead of just dealing with shit in this one.
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